Dangling his legs in the cool clear water on the shores of the Rattlesnake lake today, my son casually remarked, “You know, you cannot fix broken glass with a hammer.”
“WHAT?”
“YOU CANNOT FIX BROKEN GLASS WITH A HAMMER. YOU SEE, IF YOU TRY, IT WILL ONLY BREAK MORE.”
Where does the boy get his ideas?
It took me so long to understand this simple wisdom, he just uttered so matter-of-factly.
I grew up as a child who knew she had to be fixed. This was the view of the Soviet medicine and culture.
We knew nothing about treasuring individual differences.
If a child had a disability, people would make sure he or she knew it and felt ashamed.
There was no books or kind people who would whisper to a child crushed with shame, “A disability is just a different ability.” This concept was not born yet.
Labels such as cripple, idiot, retard were used freely by parents and teachers regardless of whether a child had clinical issues or was just “weird”.
It was perfectly OK to openly laugh at those who were different.
I STUTTERED. I WAS A WALKING JOKE.
Any time I opened my mouth, I would reveal my deficiency. Oh, how hard I tried to hide it!
Stuttering was funny. Stuttering was also something that had to be fixed.
I knew people would laugh or look away. I knew people would talk over me or be so eager to “help” my by completing my sentences. I knew had to do whatever I could to speak smoothly.
Here I was, preparing to speak in class and I could feel my heart jumping into my throat, I could see my face turning red, I could almost hear sniggers and burts of mocking laughter.
I tried to be normal and I kept failing miserably.
I remember a feeling of my face burning and my heart sinking as I mercilessly beat myself up for being a failure.
If you try to fix broken glass with a hammer, it will only break more.
Yet, I never stuttered when I talked to dogs.
Dogs do not judge. Dogs just love.
When I first started studying hypnotherapy, I learned about “the law of a reverse effect.”
Which states simply that the more we try to suppress a reaction or a behavior, the stronger it grows.
YOU CANNOT FIX BROKEN GLASS WITH A HAMMER. IT WILL ONLY BREAK IT MORE.
It took me years of studying with the renowned gurus in personal development, years of hypnotherapy, years of learning the art of energy cultivation through Universal Healing Tao and Qigong to understand a simple truth:
“SHAME, ANGER, JUDGMENT ARE HAMMER WE TRY TO FIX THE BROKEN GLASS WITH.
IT DOESN’T WORK. IT ONLY CREATES MORE PAIN.”
The more I work with clients, the more I understand that each of them already has tools and deep wisdom to heal themselves.
My job as a hypnotherapist is more like a midwife or a guide who humbly sets own ego aside. Who never assumes to know what a person needs.
MY JOB IS NOT TO JUDGE BUT TO BE FULLY PRESENT.
As one of my mentors said, “Be a mirror. Hold space for them. “
I AM A MIRROR FOR THEIR BRILLIANCE. I HOLD A CONTAINER FOR THEIR ENERGY.
I CREATE A HEALING SPACE.
Each person already has all healing tools.
They just need help accessing them.
Hypnosis is simply a state of mind which connects them to their own deep wisdom.
My son is not a wise guru. He is an ordinary boy, who needs persuasion to do his homework.
And yet, already his deep wisdom speaks through him.
And I, with all my tools and knowledge, listen.
I no longer think that anybody needs to fit any ideas of “normal” and “correct.” I learned to be humble and focused as I guide my clients.
And so often, when their deep wisdom speaks, I listen and learn.
Just like my son, dangling his legs in the cool clear water, lets his wisdom speak and be heard.
P.S. I am so enthralled with an idea of hypnotherapy in nature. It is easy to do social distancing. There is much less risk of catching a virus when you are outdoors.
I already have one client who is doing outdoor hypnotherapy with me. If you are curious, reach out to me for details.
This is, obviously, for those whose soul loves nature.❤🌹
It is for those who replenish their spirit in the forest or near the ocean. 🌊🌏🌅
It is for those who loves whispering of the trees and a feeling of soft breeze on their faces. 💖🐟
As my first outdoor client said, “I like it so much better than the office. Why we haven’t thought of it before?!)
Why indeed? Well, now I have. The outdoor office is open. And the nature is generous in sharing its healing energy.
If you are guided to being a client – online or outdoor – reach out to me and schedule your free introductory session. Let’s talk and see if we are a good match. And let’s start the deep healing with the magic of hypnosis and energy healing.