Have you noticed how many women pretend they are OK, when they are not OK?
I remember so vividly times of seasonal flu in our household.
My stepfather is sick and I am sick and we are in our rooms, wrapped warmly, snuggling with a comforting book and a hot drink. My mother is also sick. But somebody needs to take care of us. SO here she is, coughing, feverish, running around trying to make everybody comfortable.
When we try to be OK after experiencing something as devastating as death of somebody we loved deeply, it is not OK.
Because grief is a real physiological response to losing someone we connected to deeply.
It is like a gushing wound in our energy body.
We cannot just plaster it over and pretend it is not there.
Heart wounds are wounds. They need proper care.
If you cover them up and pretend they are not there, they may fester for years.
There is nothing more devastating for the body as grief.
I think I aged a lot in a week since my dog passed away.
And I have tools and knowledge.
No matter how much you know, grief is heavy on the body.
Today, I celebrate my return to joy.
I sat with my grief.
I talked to her.
I let her teach me lessons.
I gave her space and energy to heal the wound.
Today, I woke up and I knew, I am back to joy.
Not because I didn’t love my dog enough. But because I suddenly realized something very important.
My dog lived an exceptionally long life. He was almost 16.
And most of his time on this planet, he enjoyed being a dog.
This sense of pure joy of loving, this playfulness, this curiosity and vitality – he had it almost until the end. There were just two last days when he was too sick to play.
He did his best to fill my life with unconditional love and joy. It is not his responsibility anymore. It is mine.
Heart wounds are healed with attention and love. And when you listen to your feelings, even when they are painful, there are always lessons.
My lesson was – people and animals may give us love, joy, happiness and many other delightful and life-giving feelings. Sometimes, only for a day. Sometimes, for a month or two. Sometimes, for years. Sometimes for a life time.
But let us not forget that they have their life, body, destiny, and path.
You and I have our life, body, destiny, and path.
When our life paths come together and we form this magical bond of relationship and start flowing energy between us, it can be rewarding, exciting, pleasurable, divine.
But at the end, it is their life, body, destiny and path.
I sat wit my grief for a week, learning from her. What it is I need to know or realize before I return to joy?
Very simply – my dog knew how to create his own joy. Just by running through the grass or rolling in the mud or sniffing the mysterious signs during our walks. I felt joy just from watching him feeling joy. His joy was contagious and generous.
Now, as his earth journey is completed (and he did his best to stay as long as he could), I have the blueprint, the recipe for creating my own joy.
Grief is necessary to create a space for healing. But grief is not love.
Grief is necessary for building a path to return to joy, but grief is not joy.
This is why I teach the Emotional Energy Alchemy. Returning to joy is not about suppressing your feelings. It is about welcoming them as messengers and learning from them.
It is about being very clear on what you want in your life and in your body.
Paying attention to your energy body and treating heart wounds as wounds, makes a big difference.
Would my dog benefit from me spending the rest of my life with a gushing wound in my heart?
Would my dog benefit from me devastating my body with grief?
Will it help me to feel love for my dog if I keep draining my energy? I don’t think so.
I believe it is absolutely essential for women to learn Emotional Energy Alchemy tools. It is essential to know how to heal your heart and make it stronger.
It is essential for women to know how to recover from a devastating relationship or a loss.
There are so many forms of grief.
There is no right or wrong way to grieve.
But if your goal is to heal the wound, become whole again and return to joy, then there is something I learned.
Trying to be OK doesn’t work.
Trying to numb the pain may work short term, but it doesn’t heal the wound.
It is so important to know how to become your own healer, shaman, medicine woman.
If you feel these tools may be of value to you, message me and let’s schedule a free discovery session.
I’ve traveled the road of grief.
I sat with my grief.
And I know it is possible to be whole again. Returning to joy feels like resurrection.
It is a feeling of life rushing back through the very space where the gushing wound once was.
It is returning to life.