Imagine that you have to talk to a big boss, who has powers to make sure your request is fulfilled. However, in order to get to the big boss, you have to pass through a manager, whose job is to prevent people like you from bothering the big boss with their requests. No matter what you do, the manager keeps saying “no”. You can be stuck there forever, unless you find a back door… This manager is your conscious mind, your left thinking left brain, the critical factor, which is unwilling to change. Its logic is simple – If it works, don’t change it. If you really want to change something about yourself, you have to talk to the boss. And you may know already that your boss is always right.
Hypnosis is a state that allows you to bypass the manager and talk to the boss.
There are people who are easily hypnotized. You met them. You have been one of them. I am talking about children. A child until the age of 7 is not armed with critical thinking yet, and therefore is easy to influence. You may say that when you were a child between birth and the age of 7, you spent most of your life being hypnotized by other people.
This is not a weakness. It doesn’t mean you were exceptionally stupid or gullible. Little children’s brains accept most of what they are told for a good reason. Any little child who stopped to critically analyze a statement, “Look out, there is a hungry sable-toothed tiger behind that bush”, never made it to puberty. A child who doubted his mother’s words – such as “Don’t eat this plant, it will kill you” – didn’t live to tell the tale. So, the ability to critically evaluate adults’ words never made it to our gene pool.
Now consider this. How much of what you believe about yourself, good or bad, is true and accurate and how much of it are just bad hypnotic suggestions? If you think about all opinions, judgements and defining statements a typical child has to absorb before the age of 7, you will have to admit what a mess it can be. Yes, it is true that some of these suggestions are useful, such as “brush our teeth, or they will rot” and “wash your hands, or you’ll get sick”. But how many of them were poorly worded, delivered by people who were in no way qualified to judge you or landed into your mind by accident.
Since the right brain has a mind of its own and this mind is not logical or rational, it can produce responses and behaviors, which… well… strange to any logical, rationally-thinking left brain. It had its own logic, mind you. Everything that the right brain does, has some reason. Only this reason may be totally lost on any left-brained adult. Therefore, being a child with highly developed and powerful right brain – creative, imaginative, emotional – and growing in a left-brained family, among logical, rational, disciplined, orderly, well-organized adults, is an interesting mix. Remember a story about The Ugly Duckling? Nobody liked him, because he was so different. It turned out he was a swan. As you can imagine, an experience of growing up as a swan, judged by ducks, can really mess up with your self-image.
Many people who on the surface look confident, successful and happy, feel unworthy, broken, not-normal, and think of themselves as a failure, a mess, a disaster, a loser. They feel that they are wearing a mask, pretending to be somebody who they are not. Some end up in an unsatisfying or abusive relationships, because they don’t feel they deserve better. Some settle for dull, dead-end jobs, because they lack confidence in their abilities to move up to something more fulfilling. Some people, living in big crowded cities, say they are lonely and cannot make any friends, because they are mortally terrified of rejection and cannot bring themselves to start a conversation with an attractive stranger. Thousands of self-help books fly off the shelves, because people are hungry for answers. Unfortunately, most of these books give advice, which cannot pass through a very stubborn manager – your conscious mind.
To make lasting changes whether you want to solve a problem of stuttering, anxiety, low self-esteem, lack of confidence, fear and many others, you have to find this back door into your inner mind. You have to learn how to talk to your unconscious and what messages you want to deliver when you get its attention.
If you imagine a room full of amazing complex technology – cutting edge computers, linked into a powerful network – this is your unconscious mind. Neuroscience just begin to scratch the surface in its attempts to figure out what it is and how it works. A good news, you don’t have to wait. The field of hypnotherapy and NLP accumulated enough practical knowledge, which allows any sufficiently intelligent and highly dedicated individual to learn how to induce various hypnotic trances and how to communicate with their unconscious mind.
You may ask, how we can hope to learn how to change our brain if we are not quite sure how brain works. Should we wait for more answers from science? Well, consider this. A computer that you use to visit Facebook or watch videos on YouTube is a highly sophisticated device. Unless you are a computer expert, you probably don’t quite understand how it works. And yet, not only you can use it, but you can teach an 8-year old how to access Facebook and watch videos on YouTube. You don’t have to know everything about your brain to start using hypnosis and NLP. You just have to be willing to learn, be curious and determined.
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© 2017, Anna Margolina. All rights reserved.